To love you like a sister

Lundi 23 Fevrier 2026

Today I watched 2025's film by Joachim Trier called Sentimental Value. It is an incredibly beautiful film. 

I can't say if the film bears the sole responsibility for my melancholy today as it is also the time of the month where my breasts start feeling heavy and tender and I feel shrunk, into the shell of a coconut.

I keep reflecting on my sisters and how I show care for people. In all ways I feel that this film is a love letter to them... and also my mum and my dad --- but mostly my sisters. My heart wants so much to watch this film in an empty theatre with just my sisters; for us to see ourselves and afterwards talk about it. And we would know how deep our affections run for one another.

Usually, on every other day, I look forward to the quiet of the night. But today, I just wish to sleep it all away. Sleep is a time machine and in it, may I find a day; a light bright day with echoes of tress and green and the sun filtering through blades of leaves.

Sorrow for the uncertain and confusion of current times fuel this writing and this night. How charged it is. But I must let it go and let it pass through me... like branches of leaves opening up its ribs so that it not break in the weight of the wind. Have you seen that?

When I die, I leave all this behind. This shall pass and tomorrow will come. Do not be afraid. 

For now, I will sit by the sides of my sisters and make more of an effort to comb, brush and dry their hair.